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Using The “Magic”
of Intuition With Men
Have you ever felt “magic” with a man?
Like when the connection you and a guy share
is so strong that something inside you just tells
you've got something real and special.
That connection and chemistry is almost impossible
to describe to someone who doesn't have it, but
it's even more impossible to ignore when you've got
it.
Even if you know the guy isn't the right kind of
guy to be wanting to settle down with.
You can't stop thinking about the man and the
connection - it's like a spell over the both of you.
Infatuation, crushes, connections, chemistry or even
the “L” word.
That's right, LOVE.
At one time or another, one of these have had almost
magical powers over you that make you see, feel and act
in ways you never would have before.
Well, believe it or not, there's other magic waiting for
you beyond connections or chemistry when it comes to men,
dating and relationships.
The best part is that you've got your very own kind of
“magic” up your sleeve that you can tap into whenever you
want and use it for your own immediate benefit.
What kind of magic and what kind of benefits you ask?
Using this magic could mean the difference between
finding out any major issues a guy has before they
become a real problem OR getting your heart broken and
never have seen it coming.
Let me ask you...
Have you ever been with a guy and he seemed to have it
all together?
He was caring, loving, generous, present and aware and
you had such an amazing time together.
But then some of his issues popped up out of NOWHERE.
Maybe his issues were some of the dreaded and common
ones we predictable and difficult men go through like
these:
- He started getting restless and he talked about how
he wasn't really ready to settle down.
- He didn't see things getting as serious as you did.
- The connection started fading. He didn't try to
connect to you much anymore and share his intimate
feelings.
- You weren't a priority. He wanted to spend his time
with his friends or other people and didn't value the time
you spent together like you did.
- He started flirting, talking to or even getting
together with other women even if he wasn't technically
“cheating”.
Recognize any of these?
What's going on here?
Here's where your “magic” comes in.
(When I say “magic” in this case, I mean something
that will give you perception and insights into
situations before and while they're happening)
OK, you might already be thinking,
“Has he lost it?”
“What in the world is he talking about MAGIC for?”
“Who believes in that stuff anyways?”
I'm with you there...
The magic I'm talking about here isn't that
far out stuff about conjuring up spells or changing
into an animal.
Let's leave that kind of magic to Harry Potter
and your imagination.
The magic I'm talking about is different and
exists in the real world, but it's just as amazing.
And it centers around an important idea-
*You instinctively know more about what's going
on in the world around you than you or your conscious
mind fully recognizes.
Wow, getting pretty heavy here.
Don't worry... I'll bring this back down to earth
and land the plane quickly. And that's where this will
get fascinating...
Here's the kicker-
You ALREADY HAVE this magical ability.
All you have to do is tune into it.
Easier said than done, right. So how does that work?
This “magic” is something that comes “pre-wired”
in your brain because of the way your consciousness
and your subconscious mind is hooked up to the rest
of your complex body systems and senses.
So the good news is that this ability is there
for you anytime you want to use it.
But the bad news is that you have to take time
to fully tune into it and recognize your ability. Kind
of like a practice.
Music20is a good analogy for this - You can't just
pick up an instrument and start playing, right?
But once you start to become more aware of the
instrument, the music and how to play, things start
to naturally fall into place.
Sounds, melodies and rhythms just start to flow out
of you while you're in the moment.
It's like they appear out of thin air and nothing
could feel more natural. And your mind is able to process
all the information coming at it and use it to anticipate
what's next.
Well, this is EXACTLY what this magical ability of
yours is like.
Your mind is constantly picking up on information
from your environment, even when you're not really
conscious of it.
And all that information is being “processed” over
and over to try and calculate the risk, danger, and
expectations from your environment to try to find a way
towards the outcome you want.
So let's get to it. What is this “magical” ability?
And why am I talking about it?
Well, I'll start with what the ability is...
**INTUITION**
You're probably already familiar with the word.
But stop right there...
When you hear the term “intuition”, it's easy to
attach all of your previous feelings and beliefs
about it and dismiss it as some kind of new age “flaky”
stuff.
I hear you, but indulge me here by keeping an open
mind for a few minutes- I'll make it worth your while.
How?
Well, to put it simply, you'd be cheating yourself
by not spending the couple of minutes or so that it
takes to open your mind to the natural power of your
intuition and how to tune into it.
And that couple of minutes could help you solve some
of the age-old challenges women have about knowing and
understanding what's really inside a man's heart and mind.
I mean, it's not like men make it very easy for women,
right?
I don't have to tell you, but MEN ARE BAD COMMUNICATORS
when it comes to their feelings, emotions and intentions
around love and relationships.
So knowing that men are often this way, you have a
choice here:
You can either do nothing about it and continue to be
shocked, frustrated, surprised and hurt by the things you
find out about men after the fact.
Or...
You can start to create a more perceptive and insightful
way of being in your own life and relationships by using
more the natural intuitive abilities you already have.
Which one will it be?
Cool... so you're ready to tune into your own
intuitive ability.
Good call - let's get rolling.
Using Your Intuition With Men And Dating
Using your intuition might be the best, and in
some situations the ONLY, way that you'll be able
to see through all the external “behavior stuff”
going on with a man and get to the truth of what's
really happening inside his mind and what his behavior
is when you're not around.
Like when a man plays hard to get, or he doesn't call
you much or init iate, or when a man gets close and then
withdraws from you right after.
Why do men do this?
For each one of these I've got some interesting
insights and theories that can help.
But...
From my perspective, there are some extremely
important concepts that you need to understand before
you can really “get” where a man is coming from or
understand what his behaviors and issues are all about.
First, you need to build your foundation of
understanding and make sure your own personal belief
systems aren't all mixed up. If they are, there's no way
for you to see the real “cause and effect” around you.
You'll just see what your mind is fearful and afraid
of, and it will only pick out and see what it knows
from the past.
Which is usually is a result of a few things you've
experienced before.
Including good relationships, bad relationships, pain,
broken trust, destructive behaviors, etc...
Humans learn in all kind of fascinating ways, but
not all of them produce decisions and conclu sions that
reflect the reality of what's actually going on.
That's why I find belief systems so fascinating. Our
minds basically act as giant pattern recognition machines -
which can either lead us to right or wrong conclusions
and ways of perceiving our environment.
But let's bring this back down to earth...
Do you know anyone women close to you who've had
difficult relationships in the past?
And now they often have unfounded and negative fears
about any man around them?
Their past experiences have had a huge impact on
their personal beliefs and how they see themselves and
the world.
Anyways, before I get even more off on a tangent-
I've got to get on with it, so I'll need to give you
abridged version. In other words, the very shortest route
to get away from counterproductive thoughts and beliefs
you might already have and onto positive results.
Here are some of the most important concepts you'll
need to keep in your mind as you move towards listening
to and using your intuition with men:
1. Men Don 't Make Sense
All those frustrating things that men do that don't
make any sense to you as a woman will NEVER MAKE SENSE.
Stop trying to make sense of them for yourself. Trying
to make sense of a man in your own terms is entirely
counterproductive and gets little or no results other
than you becoming increasingly frustrated.
There's a better way.
2. You Can't Figure Everything Out
Have you ever REALLY hit it off with a guy but after a
few weeks or months, even though things seemed great,
the man pulled away and starting acting distant and cold?
Most men, at one time or another, do things like this
that are ridiculous and impossible to figure out. So
EXPECT to NOT UNDERSTAND everything a man does. If you can
become more comfortable with the idea of not knowing
everything about WHY a man does what he does, then you'll
feel a strange sense of calm relaxation - along with an
increase in your own self-confidence.
I'm not saying that it's OK for a man to do whatever
and that you should accept any negative and withdrawing
behaviors without bringing it up and confronting it.
You absolutely should take notice and make mention of
these things when you see them.
But the more relaxed and positive you can think and
feel around these things, no matter what the man is doing,
the sooner you'll stop fighting everything in your mind
and start creating better situations for yourself.
It's frustrating and counterintuitive, but accepting
what's going on and moving forward from that reality
in a positive way changes the whole frame of the situation.
But some women get stuck in the “I need to understand
why he does this and THEN I'll figure out what to do, think
and feel” mindset.
This almost never leads to clear thinking and positive
action. Remember, men don't make any sense. So don't depend
on their actions making sense for you to develop your own
opinions, judgments and next steps.
Pay attention to your gut, what you want in your life
and what you know is right instead of rationalizing and
finding a way for it to all fit together and be OK.
3. Ask Yourself Questions, Be Patient And Your
Intuition Will Talk
Your intuition talks to you through feelings, ima ges,
and bodily sensations such as “gut feelings”. Learn to
pay attention to what these are trying to tell you and
what's going on when they pop up in your mind.
Maybe you're being more open and relaxed when those
intuitive gut feelings come to you - so try to get back
to that place more often. This way you'll end up being
able to tap into your intuition more often when you need
it.
If you don't think you have a strong intuitive sense,
simply try asking yourself more questions and keep them
mulling around in your mind.
When you've got something in the back of your mind,
something amazing happens without you even trying.
Your brain takes notice and uses all your senses to
find any sign or trace of information that relates to
your questions as you go about your day.
It's kind of like a search running in the background
on your computer - even though you're doing something
else it doesn't stop looking.
After you've asked your questions, your mind will
start sending you ideas, feelings and images without
you even thinking about it. But sometimes this takes
more time than you'd like.
Finally, your intuitive voice will eventually just
pop up and start to give you hints and information
without you even asking for it. And then it's up to
you to pay attention, acknowledge it and make good use
of it.
4. Think Positive - Don't Fill Your Mind With Fear
And Doubt
Some women end up worrying almost obsessively that
something is wrong or going badly with a guy they're
interested in or dating once they see some negative
sign or pattern.
And once this happens, they want to know what's going
on so intently that they start letting their negative
and obsessive thoughts take over.
If you want to be able to use your intuition, you need
to start interrupting that voice in your head that's the
“fear-monger”.
You know the one - that voice that's always worrying
just to try and keep you safe and protected.
The thing is, you can't find the truth in a situation
if you if your mind is buried in your fears and doubts.
Just like how overly arrogant people can be misled
by their false sense of belief in themselves.
Keep a balanced and objective mindset.
5. Start With Smaller, Less Important Questions For
Your Intuition To Answer
If your new to using your intuition or you're
concerned with if or how to act on it, start with smaller
things that might be less important - like whether or
not you should go away for the weekend or if your friend
will like the gift you've been thinking about for them.
That way, you can be practicing and learn to use your
intuition without doing it in high-risk or high-pressure
situations. This will help you develop your abilities and
become more comfortable to trust what you find with your
intuition.
6. Act On Your Intuition With The “Long-Term” In Mind
Years ago I had a huge learning experience when it
came to using and listening to my intuition in the right
way.
The situation came up when I was worried that a few
people I worked with, who were my managers at the time,
we're talking about me and scrutinizing my work more
closely than they had before.
Feeling and sensing the scrutiny, I immediately felt
worried about my job and wondered if=2 0they were thinking
about letting me go.
The company had laid off several employees a few months
before, so I began to think that their extra attention
to my work must have something to do with another round
of cost-cutting.
Anyways, aside from my own professional insecurities
at the time, my gut told me that something bad was coming.
So what should I do?
I was really worried.
I decided to push myself even harder at work to try
and show them how valuable I was in hopes that I would
keep my job. But that uncomfortable and nervous feeling
in my stomach that came with my intuition about their
scrutiny of my work stayed with me for the next several
weeks.
Well, it turns out that my managers were watching me
and judging my performance. But it wasn't for the reasons
I feared.
A few weeks later I was called into a meeting with the
managers who had been watching me closely.
Walking down the hall to the meeting, I had a lump in
my throat and a turning stomach.
My intuition was leading me to=2 0the conclusion that this
was it - I was getting fired for the first time in my life.
I couldn't believe it.
So I walked into the meeting feelings anxious, defensive
and tense.
As I sat down, one of my managers could immediately sense
my discomfort and asked me what was wrong.
Without provocation, I immediately started defending my
job and showing my insecurities.
My emotions got the best of me and I even said a few
negative things about the managers themselves, as I wanted
to place what I saw as equal blame on the managers for the
companies problems.
They quickly stopped me once I started into these issues.
Then they let me know that they had been watching my
performance because they wanted to put me in charge of a
new division. They wanted to be confident in their decision
so they paid extra attention to my work to be sure - and
now they were.
I breathed a huge sigh of relief and my mood completely
changed.
End of story.
Thinking back, my intuition had alerted me so that I'd
be aware of what was going on.
But the mistake I made was taking that information and
using it to justify my own fears and insecurities.
If I would have taken the information, been patient
with it and applied it towards my goals in a positive
context, then the entire experience knowing that the
managers were watching my work would have been fun and
enjoyable.
But I didn't use my intuition to see my way to
something better, I simply used it as a means to worry
and stress myself out.
So all this talk about intuition.
How does it really apply to the men in your life,
dating and relationships?
Well, take a man with some of those common negative
behaviors we were talking about earlier-
- fear of intimacy
- inability to commit
- flirting, cheating
Intuition can help you see past these things and
understand them in the larger context of the deeper
real “psychological and emotional stuff” that's hiding
beneath the surface.
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Your intuition could even help you cut through a
man's ego and persona to get to the real person that's
hard to find.
I bet you've known a man who other women think would
never settle down or have a sensitive side. But you've
seen that this actually does have more long term intimate
feelings and emotional attachments buried underneath.
Intuition is probably the best tool for being able to
identify good and bad qualities in a man - and knowing
them for what they are.
A man's external or surface behavior and attitude can
be very different than his deeper desires and intentions -
as you probably already know.
Some men are, unfortunately, just good at playing the
part of an emotionally stable, available and loving guy
for a while, even if they aren't.
So it's really up to YOU to learn to get to the
“deeper emotional truth” of any man you're interested
in or dating.
And yeah, I know men can be sooo frustrating for
women.
In a better world, men would be able to tell you
honestly and sincerely where they were at.
But as you know, MEN SUCK sometimes.
They can be HORRIBLY out of touch when it comes to
feelings and emotions.
So if you're constantly surprised, blind-sided or
confused by what people around you do, (most of all men)
then it's time to get in touch with the amazing intuitive
ability you have waiting for you.
To take your intuition to the next level - the more
you already know the better.
For some of the best knowledge out there on what's inside
a man's mind, how to identify good men (or the wrong guys),
and to read more about the common behaviors most men have when
they're either smitten with a woman or desperately unable to
get it together, then check out my ebook “Catch Him And Keep
Him”.
You can check out all the details here:
Thanks for reading and best of luck in life and love.
Your Friend,
Christian Carter
©Copyright 2008, Catch Him Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Copyright materials used by permission.
“Catch Him And Keep Him” and “Christian Carter”
are trademarks of Catch Him Inc.
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